My Opinion (For what it's worth)

By Johnnie Nall

As I have mentioned in many previous articles, I am a people watcher. I find the actions and reactions of everyday, common, run of the mill people entertaining and sometimes amazing. Let me give you a couple of ticklers I have been blessed enough to observe lately.
I commute a good distance everyday. I travel the freeways and sometimes when I have some need for a leisurely drive, I go the back road that takes me past my old hang out, which I won’t name, but it does end with “Bar and Grill”.
One of the things I can’t help but notice is that the same vehicles are in the parking lot when I look over in passing. I recognize some of them from the days when I was a loyal patron and promoter for the bar and understand why they are there - the bartender, the cook and the owner. The others seem to be people in need of a drink, a friendly place to sit and relieve the stress of the day or maybe it is impossible for their vehicle to pass that spot without stopping. Being a slave to the “what if” possibilities, many things run through my mind.
Like, what if I were a cop that noticed these same things. I would think that odds are, if I happened to pull up behind a vehicle that I noticed in the parking lot of a bar everyday, I would venture a wild guess that I could safely stop them and easily get a .08 or higher. I am not saying these people are drunks or heavy imbibers, just that a .08 can be reached by sitting in the same room with a person that is drinking and breathing.
I was a frequent inhabitant of this location and even though my usual fare was a pitcher of Bud Lite before I switched to diet coke, I would fill the role of a participant in a failure of a breathalyzer test and be cuffed, hauled away and thrown in jail. Hmm, am I glad my spot in the lot was taken over by someone with funds to complete the supply and demand chain.
On these commutes, I have been exposed to the racy side of life also. Not racy as in race cars or commuters racing, but some of the actions that are committed that I consider racy.
Recently the freeway was at a standstill due to an overturned Ford Explorer on the shoulder. We all know when something like this occurs, everyone becomes a lookie-loo hoping to see a dash of blood, a dismembered body part, or maybe if they have been good, an actual body laying beside the road.
Anyhow, during this standstill, the State Patrol were directing traffic to use the carpool lane so they could squeeze as many people as possible past the scene, utilizing all lanes without an inverted Expedition blocking the way. This put a brand new Lexus between a freightliner that was already merged into the carpool lane and myself.
Driving this Lexus was a less than ugly, but far from beautiful lady. While we were stopped, she was on her cell phone frantically waving her arms and looking at her watch, which was a fairly good indicator that she was late for something she should be on time for. Now picture this folks; this lady began unbuttoning her blouse with one hand while carrying on the conversation on her phone. When that task was completed she removed the white blouse and threw it over the seat.
I may be in my early 60’s but this became an interesting focal point for my attention, since I am not into scanning accident scenes for dead or dismembered bodies. When I did remove my eyes from the action for a split second, I noticed the driver of the freightliner had his eyeballs hanging out of the passenger window of his cab and taking in the show.
The woman who had decided to turn the Interstate into a dressing room was now sitting in her Lexus, with absolutely nothing on, reaching over her shoulder for the garment bag hanging on the hook over her rear window. As she ripped the bag open, she removed a sweater from it and proceeded to pull it over her head while maintaining the conversation on the cell phone.
A couple of small items that I noticed during this episode was that, 1) she had reached the time in her life that she should give some serious thought to purchasing a bra with a little support and 2) perhaps wearing it on her freeway wardrobe changes. I am not complaining mind you, I am a staunch believer in freedom of choice and will defend her right to let her boobs droop to the death.
Now comes the point of this column. As the tow truck removed the Expedition and the traffic started to move, this very classy lady, in her very classy Lexus, rolled down her driver’s window and put her dainty hand out the window with her middle finger protruding, waving it back and forth at me and the driver of the freightliner.
Please explain to me what we did wrong. My wife would say, “Well, you shouldn’t have been looking.” A statement like that would be akin to saying, “if my smoke bothers you, hold your breath.” I ain’t dead, just old, so looking is probably one of the few choices I have left.
After giving this some serious thought, I this question for the ladies in my reader’s circle: Why do you wear revealing clothing if you don’t expect someone to look? I am not saying that you shouldn’t dress the way you want to, but I would think it would be expected that guys are going to look. And believe me, I hope you continue to wear what you want when you want. I ain't complaining.
Anyhow that is my opinion and I am sticking to it.